Tom Watkins Coaching

Leadership Coaching | Self-Management | Capacity Development

Incorporating EncourageMentors and Thriving Workplace.

Join 1,319 other subscribers
You are here: Home / Archives for Personal resilience
post

Drawing the line at criticism

By

Responding to criticism with composure and curiosity rather than reacting reflexively is a skill greatly eased by learning to recognise our feelings and the mindsets that activate them, in real time. When we can do that, we are better able to listen confidently to critical comments, hold clear limits or prevent more when we’ve heard enough. Identifying if and when any line should be drawn, calls for situational awareness, mindfulness and emotional agility.  Announcing and holding the … [Read more...]

post

Choose how you respond to pressure, disruption and uncertainty | Tom Watkins

By

Struggling to accept what we are sometimes faced with is a normal part of being alive, like a tax on being human works-in-progress. Our battles with reality are usually won, in the end, by reality. But have you noticed that for very many people, reality increasingly involves relentless pressure and frenzy? Three inescapable societal trends are behind this. Being overwhelmed by them is optional. I was with a friend for one of our regular discussions we have, over coffee or during a 30-minute … [Read more...]

post

The best and simplest goal: get better

By

Can most of us, with enough persistent effort, get pretty good at anything? Probably. Effort, as psychologist Angela Duckworth has shown, counts twice:  talent x effort = skill, and skill x effort = achievement.  And though both talent and our willingness to exert persistent effort may be at least partially genetic, only a minority of our personality is inherited. High performers  don’t rely on either nature or nurture, but on a combination of the two — and they are really good at nurturing … [Read more...]

post

Like a clock during a thunderstorm

By

We are shaped by what gains our attention and occupies our thoughts. To limit unhelpful fight, flight or freeze reactions to adversity, we must develop some voluntary mind-control over our attention. We should know how to put it where we want it, whenever we need to. Quiet minds cannot be perplexed or frightened, but go on in fortune or misfortune at their own private pace, like a clock during a thunderstorm. [Robert Louis Stevenson] Acquiring this ability should never become a matter of … [Read more...]

post

Emotional Agility

By

To have a decent shot at developing our personal character, we must bring the mind itself under control. For this ... We should prepare for a lifetime of challenge, as there is no more difficult task in life. [1]  One test of progress is how calm we remain under provocation. On what does our ability to do that depend, and how might we enhance it? Mountaineering over a molehill I offered to support a colleague, but during the exchange he offloaded irritation in my direction. It was a simple … [Read more...]

post

It’s Terrible! Let’s Co-ruminate.

By

Three sharply-dressed passengers sitting nearby on an early morning flight were sufficiently loud, articulate and interesting for me to overhear their conversation. Mid-level managers in a high-tech industry, I figured. Over the next 50 minutes they repeatedly agreed they'd be more effective and happier if their staff, colleagues, senior executives and clients would behave better, just get out of their way, or be different people. Definitely a co-ruminating group:  regurgitating and re-heating … [Read more...]

post

Enhance personal resilience

By

Experiencing adversity . . ?  Then you're suffering, right? Not necessarily, of course. At some level we all understand that emotional resilience is situational; we sometimes have it and sometimes lose it. We know that adversity can draw out and develop personal strengths.  Resilience is not a rare quality limited to confident optimists with few negative attitudes. We may also accept that personal resilience is our own responsibility. Almost everyone has a degree of mental robustness and … [Read more...]